Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
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She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize