She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
