i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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