Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
