I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
So here I am, sexting at work.
that is very illegal...i love you.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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