I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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