Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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