Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
