You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
