How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize