He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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