my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
