was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I am available for nakedness
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
