I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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