party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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