Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
