How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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