My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Randomize