I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize