The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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