i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
