My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?