i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Randomize