So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
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I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
16 People Who Have Raised The Bar For Petty Revenge
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed