just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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