Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
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i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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