Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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