quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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