I need to stop coming to work sober
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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