This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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