She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
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