Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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