She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
