So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
