If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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