do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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