i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
