i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Randomize
