im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
we should paint friendship bongs
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