so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
