We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Randomize
