found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
