i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
