omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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