that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
