She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
