ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
