we're blogging at a bar
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
