I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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