Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
