Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize