its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Randomize
